Reading physical book. Haven’t done that in ages. It’s so heavy! And where is the built in light?! — @catehstn

How come you never find someone showing “mitigated gall?” It’s always the full-on variety. — @PragmaticAndy

@PragmaticAndy Likewise, I've never heard of gruntled employees... — @bdstevens

Have you seen my latest party trick? Don’t try this at home, folks! http://virg.co/sbr #talentschool — @richardbranson

I’m racing the #37 @ConquestRacing LMP2 in the Long Beach Grand Prix tomorrow at 4:30pm. Watch it live on ESPN2 or http://alms.com. — @dhh

First day of rowing lessons. Ended up in the water and surprised my instructor by being able to get back in the boat. — @tswicegood

Batteries are my Curse and Damnation. — @cloudforest

*shakes fist* Nested HAML partials *shakes fist* </rant> — @johnsonch

I was a really nice guy until I used Rails. Now I kick puppies on my way to set fire to orphanages as I rant on Hacker News while driving. — @jm

1. I have to *reboot* my mac before it recognizes the TV on the end of the HDMI cable? 2. No sound? Isn’t that point of HDMI? — @marick

When the revolution comes, those who provide XML configuration and build files will be first against the wall. — @rit

Hey @nabshow tried to update my profile only to find Ms. is not an option. Only Mr., Miss, Mrs., Dr. What year is this is? 1955? — @jenred

Grrr. Technology is awesome except when it isn’t. — @bphogan

Great...have started getting recaptcha’s with non-Latin scripts. Today it’s Arabic. — @headius

It just took me 15 minutes to disentangle my bra from a USB cable. There’s something oddly appropriate about that. — @snipeyhead

Our washing machine just sent a status report to my cell phone. — @pragdave

My friend Scott just used big-O notation to describe the length of a relationship, and I didn’t even blink about it until 5 min later. — @demew

1. My chess rating has dropped 1500 points since I started traveling for work. 2. Politicians spend a lot of time on the road. #hmm — @gvwilson

I wasn’t wearing the bra at the time, although the mental picture is much funnier that way. — @snipeyhead

Observation: being left handed works well when doing book signings. Shake right, sign left, don’t put down pen. — @adamgoucher

How you get your geek to do anything for you: “@chrisjpowers: Just got this text message from @sarahapowers: ‘Sudo! Bring me some pie!’” — @redsquirrel

When you come to a fork in the road, pick it up and keep it in inventory. Eventually you’ll need it to prop open a door or stab a dragon. — @pragpub

Don't mistake your email inbox for a to-do list. — @staffannoteberg

Here’s an idea: Comment forms have a captcha, not to prove the commenter is a human, but that the commenter has read the damn article. — @petdance

Remember kids, there are no problems that can’t be solved by creatively piping Unix commands together. — @bketelsen

Miles to Kilometers conversion is a Fibonacci sequence... #cool http://www.mnn.com/earth-matters/wilderness-resources/blogs/cool-math-trick-converting-between-miles-and-kilometers — @scottdavis99

The game where you try to chase your cats off of the carpet as they throw up is a game everyone loses. — @tekniklr

The second rule of Cite Club is ibid. — @dwineman